Day 3! It begins!

10:31 PM

Good evening Blog World!

So after a few days of doctors appointments and tests, I got word from the fertility clinic that today is my day 3 and I can start taking Clomid! 

I've been anticipating this day for almost a year and am ecstatic that we're here.

I will be taking the Clomid for 5 days now and then go back to the clinic on my day 10 to begin cycle monitoring. 

During our consultation we were given multiple choices as far as fertility treatment goes. Andrew and I opted for the most natural and least expensive option to start with (why not, it might work). We chose to start with the fertility drugs and intercourse with no injections. My hope is that we conceive our baby as naturally as possible, and right now I'm hoping that the first option works because the whole process quickly becomes mechanical and I don't want to lose the chance to conceive a baby out of love. We will see though :)

I also received some other good news yesterday. I don't have osteoarthritis as originally thought. I went to the specialist and my x-ray's and bone scan came back fine. There will be more investigation now because he thinks it may be my nerves, but he said that it's great news that it isn't my bones. So I will take his word for it and celebrate it! :)

For the first time in almost two years it feels like my health, finances, stress level, job, relationship are all coming together. I say this hesitantly as I have felt this way before shortly before everything came crashing down, though I do feel like I am in a better place now to deal with obstacles. 

Diabetes for example was quite a blow. I hate the disease, but at the same time must embrace it and not let it defeat me. Simply, because I have no other options. I'd like to say that I think like this 100% of the time, but the reality is that I don't. I can get into a slump sometimes and wish it wasn't happening to me or that if I could go back in time, I would do things differently. It is so easy to get caught up in thinking like this and get myself to a point where I can believe that it's possible or that I have nothing to worry about. The hardest part is reminding myself that I am still young, I'm not 80 and if I want a long life, I have to make the crucial changes now because I have a long go at this. It's not how I envisioned my life, but to be honest, nothing in my life up until this point has been. Time to stop envisioning and start living in the moment. (There we go, new goal to add for this year).

With all that being said, right now is a good time to give myself a lecture on how I have been eating lately. Recently I have lost 14 lbs, but I have this tendency to be satisfied with a small amount of success and stop focusing on my original goal. In my head I know that it's a stupid way of thinking, however the convenience of that Big Mac can easily overtake my will power. So this is me committing to my original goal of becoming healthier and building a safe and healthy home for our future baby.

Well, I think that's it for now. 

Until next time blog world!